Let me tell you how I spent much of Thursday.
I had been invited to Carberry Tower by the Ministries Council of the Church of Scotland to be part of a group discussing the issue of same-sex relationships and the ministry. I had not a clue about what I was going to take part in, other than the banner for the meeting was A Place for Hope the Church's conflict resolution project.
There were about 30 of us there, all wondering why we had been invited. We were meant to represent a range of views and opinions on the issue and I suppose we did. I planned simply to listen. The day was facilitated by an American, David Brubecker, a man very skilled in his job of facilitation and resolution as we were to find out!
The Samoan Circle was 6 chairs forming an inner circle, a group within the group, as it were. Anyone who wanted to speak had to take one of the speaking chairs and the others were to listen. We were to answer a question about our opinions on this issue and then later a question about the future of the Church. I had no plan to speak.
However, in the afternoon I did speak. This is the gist of my contribution.
I have been in ministry for 28 years and in that time have grown well-used to being in a minority because of the views I hold. Until now, I have been able to live happily in that minority with no feeling of threat. This time it is different; this time, being in the minority feels being threatened! It feels, from where I sit, that those who appear to hold the majority view on this issue keep telling me what to do and what to believe and that the future of the church is down to me giving up my minority view. We are a broad Church, we are told and when I hear people say that, it is as if they are telling me I have to accommodate myself to them! My views are not about hating anyone, but are genuinely formed and sincerely held from my reading of the Bible. I tried to persuade the group that when we talk about the Church we need to be careful in how we speak: is it 'you' or is it 'we'? Is there a mutual responsibility for the Church or are you telling me what to do and what I should believe?
Having done this job for a while now, I hope I am still willing to listen to advice, but I also hope that those with whom I may disagree will treat me well and respect that there is a certain amount of experience and professional expertise behind the things I believe and the way in which I conduct my ministry. It is a delicate balance to hold.
The outcome of the Samoan Circle? A realisation that we all love the Church, but we still wait for the outcome of the General Assembly 2011.
Pray that we discern the will of God for His Church!
